28/11/2011
This is your life
I don't know what to do or how to act or anything, I don't even know how to write how I feel on here.
27/11/2011
Paint the Silence
Had a weekend at the farm with Izzy, so so so nice. I really love my farm, it's one of my favourite places to be on earth, it's very tranquil so beautiful. I've never been anywhere like it. Here are some photos.
23/11/2011
The Fall of Man
Christie.
Why do you feel the need to draw so much attention to yourself? We were here for you but you can't keep using people and making everything seem about you, when nothing really is. Simple things are about you, things that aren't intended to be about you are about you, and that is because you need to draw attention to yourself. Why do you have this psychological need for it? You're willing to do such stupid things just to people will have sympathy for you, and we do at first, but then you drag people down with you and they can't help you. Then you bring up everything, even the smallest thing, and make it have to do with you. No one can get annoyed with you because you will use it as an excuse, and when someone finally won't put up with it, and they stop being your friend, you go insane. She's moved on but all you'll do is keep harassing to get a reaction, so you can cause more and more drama for yourself, because you need something to talk about, and you need attention. Please stop it, honestly, we're all so tired of it that actually, we don't care anymore.
Why do you feel the need to draw so much attention to yourself? We were here for you but you can't keep using people and making everything seem about you, when nothing really is. Simple things are about you, things that aren't intended to be about you are about you, and that is because you need to draw attention to yourself. Why do you have this psychological need for it? You're willing to do such stupid things just to people will have sympathy for you, and we do at first, but then you drag people down with you and they can't help you. Then you bring up everything, even the smallest thing, and make it have to do with you. No one can get annoyed with you because you will use it as an excuse, and when someone finally won't put up with it, and they stop being your friend, you go insane. She's moved on but all you'll do is keep harassing to get a reaction, so you can cause more and more drama for yourself, because you need something to talk about, and you need attention. Please stop it, honestly, we're all so tired of it that actually, we don't care anymore.
Lost!
I'm pretty sad because there is no way for me to post music just as music without a video, so now I am forced to post the fim clips, pretty sad I know guyz
22/11/2011
17/11/2011
Good Morning
So there you go, everything I've found and loved on stumble upon, so great. Still feeling shitty and cannot be bothered to write anything more. kthxbye
Miles Away [John Peel Session]
All of these are from various websites on stumbleupon
I absolutely adore this painting below me, I have no idea why but it is so beautiful. I think of Robyn from Tomorrow When the War Began.
16/11/2011
Reflection
Sorry I haven't posted in a while, my phone broke and my exams are on, so nothing interesting for anyone to see. Posting now because I need to rant, like have this rant so huge your eyes will pop out after it. If you know me, and I haven't told you about this, be warned- mention it to me and I will be incredibly mad. No one should really see this though, considering I only have about 6 followers.
Just on monday I got some serious stuff from the doctor that I'm not going to say directly. It is so unbelievably unlike me that I can't even begin to describe it. I'm tense and nervous all the time, I have panic attacks at least once every two days. I'm usually really relaxed and positive but now I feel like there's no point in doing anything, everyone and everything angers me, and I feel like I'm on the verge of tears all the time. And usually I'm the one who's helping my friends out when they've got problems. I just don't know how to deal with myself. I'd give anything to be feeling back to normal.
My parents fucking know shit all about it. Honestly, they both have absolutely no idea how to treat me. My mum keeps going from up to down, she's so so overly nice and protective that I want her to go the fuck away, but then when I'm having a panic/asthma attack and vomiting from stress she tells me she needs sleep or screams at me and tells me I'm being ridiculous. My dad just seems to think that I'll get over it if I try, and I know it's my mind and it's my fault that I'm like this but I really can't see a way out of it. My friends aren't concerned, but that's fine considering I didn't tell them.
I just fucking hate being in this state of mind. I cry at everything, I scream at people for no reason, I've stopped eating properly because I want to lose weight, and I know it's wrong. I do, but I just don't know how to get out of it. Exams probably aren't helping right now. But I feel like I'm drowning in my feelings and I can't resurface. I act perfectly normal to everyone but underneath I just feel so desperately upset, and I hate it. I know people have a lot worse situations than I do, and I have absolutely no reason to be like this- but I am, and I can't help that. And I know that one of my best friends thinks that I'm doing it all for attention, but I've had to deal with someone doing that and dumping all of her "problems" on me and I absolutely hated it, so I know that I can't bother them with what's going on, because they'll be like fuck off. So this is how I'll have to get it out I guess, and it's not fun, and I wish I could do it another way, but I feel like my only other alternative is to bottle it up so much until something bad happens, like cutting myself or something, and I don't want to turn into a "freak" as my mother so lovelily pointed out this afternoon.
Just on monday I got some serious stuff from the doctor that I'm not going to say directly. It is so unbelievably unlike me that I can't even begin to describe it. I'm tense and nervous all the time, I have panic attacks at least once every two days. I'm usually really relaxed and positive but now I feel like there's no point in doing anything, everyone and everything angers me, and I feel like I'm on the verge of tears all the time. And usually I'm the one who's helping my friends out when they've got problems. I just don't know how to deal with myself. I'd give anything to be feeling back to normal.
My parents fucking know shit all about it. Honestly, they both have absolutely no idea how to treat me. My mum keeps going from up to down, she's so so overly nice and protective that I want her to go the fuck away, but then when I'm having a panic/asthma attack and vomiting from stress she tells me she needs sleep or screams at me and tells me I'm being ridiculous. My dad just seems to think that I'll get over it if I try, and I know it's my mind and it's my fault that I'm like this but I really can't see a way out of it. My friends aren't concerned, but that's fine considering I didn't tell them.
I just fucking hate being in this state of mind. I cry at everything, I scream at people for no reason, I've stopped eating properly because I want to lose weight, and I know it's wrong. I do, but I just don't know how to get out of it. Exams probably aren't helping right now. But I feel like I'm drowning in my feelings and I can't resurface. I act perfectly normal to everyone but underneath I just feel so desperately upset, and I hate it. I know people have a lot worse situations than I do, and I have absolutely no reason to be like this- but I am, and I can't help that. And I know that one of my best friends thinks that I'm doing it all for attention, but I've had to deal with someone doing that and dumping all of her "problems" on me and I absolutely hated it, so I know that I can't bother them with what's going on, because they'll be like fuck off. So this is how I'll have to get it out I guess, and it's not fun, and I wish I could do it another way, but I feel like my only other alternative is to bottle it up so much until something bad happens, like cutting myself or something, and I don't want to turn into a "freak" as my mother so lovelily pointed out this afternoon.
10/11/2011
Where is my mind
totally just made a Harry Potter video! I'm so proud of it! So I'm going to share it with you lovely kids!
08/11/2011
One Crowded Hour
ALL THE MOVIES I HAVE WATCHED ON MY 16 DAYS OF NOT BEING AT SCHOOL
1. The Lion King (watched it twice)
2. The Lion King 3
3. The Little Mermaid
4. Aladdin
5. Aladdin 2
6. Hitch hikers guide to the Galaxy
7. Seven (see what I did there...)
8. The Dark Knight
9. The Number 23
10. Beastly
11. Scream 4
12. 127 hours
13. Tomorrow when the war began
14. 1984 (haven't watched it yet but it's rented)
15. Pirates of the Caribbean 2
16. Pirates of the Caribbean 3
17. Pirates of the Caribbean 4
19. Harry Potter 1
20. Harry Potter 4
21. Harry Potter 7 part 2.
I think that's it, but I'm sure there's more, so you may get updates.
A lot of things have occured while I've been a sick bubba. It was bronchitis at first but then they gave me the wrong medication so I lounged around for a week waiting for it to kick in and it didn't... so then I got PNEUMONIAAA IN THE BRONCHEAL TUBES, because my life rocks! And then I went on another antibiotic which did the trick but when I attempted to go back to school I got the shakes so we went back to the doctor about the shakes and she said it was just a side effect of the antibiotics but me mam wasn't convinced, and I wasn't better on the sunday so we went to le doctor yesterday and she says that my disease has left the building but anxiety about missing two weeks and a bit just before my exams has replaced it and my shakes are panic attacks which either root from anxiety or depression.
COOL KATY FAURE.
1. The Lion King (watched it twice)
2. The Lion King 3
3. The Little Mermaid
4. Aladdin
5. Aladdin 2
6. Hitch hikers guide to the Galaxy
7. Seven (see what I did there...)
8. The Dark Knight
9. The Number 23
10. Beastly
11. Scream 4
12. 127 hours
13. Tomorrow when the war began
14. 1984 (haven't watched it yet but it's rented)
15. Pirates of the Caribbean 2
16. Pirates of the Caribbean 3
17. Pirates of the Caribbean 4
19. Harry Potter 1
20. Harry Potter 4
21. Harry Potter 7 part 2.
I think that's it, but I'm sure there's more, so you may get updates.
A lot of things have occured while I've been a sick bubba. It was bronchitis at first but then they gave me the wrong medication so I lounged around for a week waiting for it to kick in and it didn't... so then I got PNEUMONIAAA IN THE BRONCHEAL TUBES, because my life rocks! And then I went on another antibiotic which did the trick but when I attempted to go back to school I got the shakes so we went back to the doctor about the shakes and she said it was just a side effect of the antibiotics but me mam wasn't convinced, and I wasn't better on the sunday so we went to le doctor yesterday and she says that my disease has left the building but anxiety about missing two weeks and a bit just before my exams has replaced it and my shakes are panic attacks which either root from anxiety or depression.
COOL KATY FAURE.
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